Thanks, You Too!

"Isn't this great, my flight leaves at eight her flight lands at nine, my game just rewinds." - CW


I never really got this line by the late-great black Frank White (on the topic, who the hell was the white Frank White anyway??). If his flight leaved at 8 PM and hers got in at 9 PM, wouldn't he miss spitting game at the aforementioned lady? Anyway.. it brings me to the scene of countless of douche bag moments brought on by habit: airports.

I like airports. There is a sense of excitement in the air because you are about to be going somewhere. It is like social purgatory. Everyone is on the move, or waiting to be. What I despise about airports is the mini-conversation I ALWAYS end up having with the workers there, and it goes a little something like this:

worker: "Have a great flight!"

me: "Thanks, you too!"

...

Of course, as you can see, that makes no fucking sense. The workers aren't flying anywhere, they are staying put. Thus, my saying "Thanks, you too!" makes me sound like a complete douche. Safe to say, I am sure many of you have experience this annoying feeling. Not to mention the awkward stuttering that occurs immediately after the said phrase:

me: "Uh.. I m.. I mean.. thanks. You're not flying, are you! Heh, heh. Have a goo.. have a good day."

worker: (awkward gander slash slow turn and/or walk away)

This always occurs. Usually when they check my bag or take my boarding pass. And I always try to stand there several seconds longer than needed to explain myself. It's just habit: when someone says anything starting with "Have a great/good ________," you always, without reserve say, "Thanks, you too!"

Not in airports, though.