Wednesday, February 24, 2010


5-hour ENERGY!!!!

Let's start off by stating that this shit works. It gives you a pretty substantial boost. It's best taken before a night of partying for which you do not feel well rested. It is not best taken 5 minutes before playing a basketball game at 9:15PM on a weeknight. Like I just did 2 hours ago.

I don't feel very good right now. I am dead tired, but not. It's weird. I still have a 5-hour ENERGY!!!! buzz even though I have been up since 6AM on 5-hours OF SLEEP!!!!

I started taking this concoction perhaps a year ago. Out of curiosity. Looks like curiosity killed the DAT.

Well, not yet, but I am pretty sure that if I keep taking this that I will die. Notice how I use the verb "take" and not "drink." Have you noted it? Good. The shortened version of "to notice" should be "to note," even though it's not. Or is it? Not too sure. I'm rambling.

Anyway, you should all give this 5-hour ENERGY!!!! a shot. Especially if you are consistent coffee drinkers. This can't be worse for you than 5 cups of coffee in the morning. I've heard coffee is best for you when you are coughing. I guess you could call it coughee. (I did not hear that btw).

How does a commonly used phrase become a web acronym? And how does a NOT commonly used phrase become a web acronym? Like FTW. I feel like that is a fucking retarded acronym. I just really dislike it. Perhaps it's because I am unsure of how to properly use it. I like the word "acronym" though. So much so I will now try to use it to mean a food. If I ate enough acronyms, perhaps I would be able to successfully climb the acrocrag. FTW.

Where were we? Oh yes, 5-hour ENERGY!!!! I guess if I took this at 9:15 I am now on hour 2.25. Fuck. That means I have 2.75 more hours left (relax, I used to be a math teacher). You know what's really going to suck? When I finish writing this dumb ass blog post and go to bed. You know why? Because I am going to toss and turn for 2.75 hours. Then, at 3:15 in the morning, I will fall into a coma. I'd rather fall into a comma than a period (right ladies?!)



getlowe said...

Oh. my. GOD. 5-Hour ENERGY!!!! obviously works as crack for you, so please stop "taking" it. This post was hilarious/terrifying to read. And you can use "note" in the place of "notice," i.e. "please note the following" but they don't mean exactly the same thing.

Are you okay?

And, what's up with the Japanese comment on my blog? Not cool.

DAT said...

haha, yes I am OK. although my prediction came true, I could not fall asleep for awhile last night!

I figured if anyone was to leave a Japanese comment on your wall you would rather it be me!